Go beyond surface questions

“It was he who gave some to be apostles, some to be prophets, some to be evangelists, and some to be pastors and teachers, to prepare God's people for works of service, so that the body of Christ may be built up until we all reach unity in the faith and in the knowledge of the Son of God and become mature, attaining to the whole measure of the fullness of Christ.” (Ephesians 4:11-13)

This past weekend was our second annual men’s conference at NewLife. The two men most responsible for creating the first conference, Eric Hesselbach and Paul Joss, made the decision before the first conference to use exclusively NewLife men as the main speakers and leaders of breakout discussion groups instead of bringing in someone from the outside. The reason is that while bigger conferences such as Iron Sharpens Iron or Women of Faith might expose us to more polished, gifted speakers who can inspire and teach us, there is something more beautiful and practical about using men from our own church who would be available for follow-up conversations and relationship at any point throughout the year.

I found this aspect to be the most beneficial part of the conference this year. As different men of NewLife spoke about getting into the Bible, trusting God’s provision, balancing work and family life, and so many other topics, it became clear that there is a lot of accumulated wisdom in the men of our church – some gained from things we have done well, and some from lessons learned through past mistakes. By the end of the conference, I was encouraged by how the door had been opened for the possibility of deeper conversations and relationships among the men of our church.

I would encourage you, whether or not you can attend a weekend such as the one that just passed, to ask questions of the men and women you see regularly on a Sunday or in a community group. Ask questions that are deeper than just “how is your job” or “did you see the football game yesterday?” There can be a lot of wisdom gained by asking questions such as:

- What helps you build your relationship with God?
- What do you use to help you know God’s Word?
- What have you found to be helpful in building your marriage?
- What do you do to help your children grow in the Lord?
- What is one book you’ve read that has really helped you in your faith or life?
- How do you balance your work and home life?
- What are some challenges you’ve had to face in your life?

Asking questions such as these can help you not only to tap into the wisdom of the men and women of the church, but can connect you in deeper ways with your brothers and sisters in the church as well.